A little about me and my debt

I'm in debt. It's painful to say that because I consider myself kind of smart, but it's the truth. I'm in way over my head and it's scary.

I've been married for nearly 20 years and my first collection agency notice came probably like a week after my husband and I moved in together. We weren't even married yet. My husband should have ran while he had the chance.

Since then we've had repo-ed cars - several of them - lost a house to foreclosure, been sued on multiple occasions, and had collection agencies all over our asses for years. We even filed for bankruptcy about ten years ago.

And we're back where we were before the bankruptcy. Heck, we're probably worse off than we were then.


I feel like our debt is different than most other people's because we have so many different bills. I see people who have $80,000 worth the debt in three credit cards and I envy them because they only have three debts to deal with.

I have like 60. Yes, 60. Actually I have no idea how many we have. I'm afraid to count. I do know I have everything from a $25 bounced check fee from four or five years ago to an $11,000 hospital bill from a stroke I had in May of 2013.

Yes, I also have no insurance. I work for myself at home and can't afford insurance due to being overweight, having had a stroke in May and also a battle with cancer I had three years ago. I also can't afford to not have insurance. It's a catch 22. My husband has insurance through his job but because I can technically have kids, it's nearly $1000 a month for my kids and I to have insurance through his company.

Did I mention that all this scares the crap out of me?

I've spent a lot of my time as a debt-carrying member of society just ignoring it all but ignoring it all has gotten me into trouble many times before. I'm honestly surprised I'm not divorced. My husband is definitely a good man ... better than most.

But it's time to take stock and do something about this. I'm 38, fat, in a hole I'm not sure how to get out of, and I'm tired of it all. That's where this blog comes in. It's time to take a stand and do the right thing but I feel I need friends to go on the journey with me. Sometimes having people you don't know have your back is better than facing a long journey alone.

I plan on getting serious and getting busy. I've considered filing bankruptcy once again but I've decided I don't want to do that. I want to take responsibility for this mess and take care of it like an adult.

It's time ...